Maka's Antics
by alleycat12
Summary: What happens when Maka has a few too many drinks and Soul is left to take care of her?


Hello! I was really bored and this happened. Sorry for the lack of/terrible details. It's all in the dialogue, you know? Keep that in mind before you blow up the review box about how there are crappy details. I had fun writing this (busting out laughing in the middle of advanced algebra WILL get you weird looks apparently) (There is nothing funny about advanced algebra. It's the devil in the form of a subject)

*Disclaimer: I don't own Soul Eater. It'd be plain crap if I did.

Also, I'm slurring. Any bad grammar on Maka's part is intentional

…

"Oh my- Maka! Stop!" Soul pulls his partner back from where she tries to walk away.

"Why do I gotta?" Maka swings around, eye's clouded. Soul sighs.

"Because I say so."

Maka squints and nearly trips. "You aren' my momma!" Soul gives up leading her on foot and picks her up piggy-back style.

"Maka, how many drinks did you have?"

"Hmmm…How many afros have weh kille'?"

"You mean Afreet?" Soul glances to the side while Maka lolls her head.

"Yeah, afros."

Soul counts in his mind and answers. "Fifty-seven."

"O'ay then. I ha' eigh'."

"Oh, well that shouldn't be SO-," Soul starts, walking with the girl's light weight on his back.

"Of Fi'eball."

"MAKA! WHY?" Soul almost drops the girl, but recovers quickly.

"Kiddie said it was symmetrical." Soul fights the urge to facepalm and sighs.

"I swear to-,"

"IT'S NOT NICE TO SWEAR!" Maka smacks the back of Soul's head and tugs on his knotted hair.

"Oi, Maka! What are you? Eight?"

"You are wha' you drin'!" Maka pushes her head back and yells the words proudly.

"Maka, I _promise_ we will be home soon. You will be able to go to sleep." Soul hoists the slipping girl higher on his back.

"No res' for da wicked"

Miraculously, the girl quiets down for half a minute before screaming. "OH MAH GAWSH! A DEAD CA'!" She points to the top of a trashcan where a calico cat sleeps peacefully.

"No! Maka, he isn't dead! He's just aslee-,"

"IT'S OKAY, KITTY! YOU LIVE' A GOOD LIFE!" Maka steers her ride to the trashcan and pats the feline's head harshly. It awakens and hisses, biting at her hand and running deeper into the alleyway. Tears begin to well in the corners of Maka's eyes before she full out starts sobbing. "HIS GHOS' DIDN' LIKE ME!" She cries into Soul's shoulder, soaking the cloth of his shirt.

"Maka, it's okay. He was just sleeping."

"I won't sleep! Whe' you sleep, you die an' turn into a ghos' that bites people! I don't wanna bite you!" Tired of the cries, Soul looks back at her tear-streaked face.

"You won't bite me."

Despite his attempt to make her feel better, Soul can't seem to quiet the crying girl.

"OH MY GAWSH!"

"What this time?" Soul prepares himself for the worst but gets an odd answer.

"A penny! I wan't it."

"A…penny? Maka, if it means that much to you I'll just give you one when we get home." Soul hears Maka gasp at his words.

"You are so nice! I love you! A penny! Soul! Guess what! I ge' a penny!"

"Woohoo!" Soul chuckles at the girl's excitement and feels hot breath in his ear.

"Soul. I gotta tell you somethin' importan'."

"Yeah?" Maka leans in closer, making Soul get a nervous shiver in his stomach.

"EGGS ARE PEOPLE TOO!"

Soul reels back, surprise from the scream that just entered his ear and rattled his brains. "What?"

"THEY JUS' WANNA BE LOVED BUT THEN THEY DIE!"

 _Aaaaand she's crying again,_ Soul sighs. "Maka, stop personifying eggs."

"B-But they wanna-HURGH! ACK!"

"Oh, wonderful." Soul cringes at the smell as his partner leans to the side and empties her stomach until only bile rises. He pulls her up after she's done and finishes the walk to the apartment. The burn from the puke silences his drunk friend. When they cross the threshold, Soul dumps Maka on her bed. She sits up and giggles, wrapping her arms around Soul's neck.

"Thanks for gettin' me home safe."

"N-no problem. Oh! Here!" Soul reaches into the depths of his pocket and pulls out a penny. Maka squeals and grasps the copper coin, having Soul have to pull it out of her mouth and set it on the bedside table. "Leave that right there, okay?" Maka nods and he pulls the covers up over her clothed body. "Good night." He pads into the living room and sighs, turning on the television. As the Late Late Late Show with Lord Death comes on, Maka's door opens. The bathroom door then closes and Soul hears the terrible sounds of puking coming from the room.

"That part's all you," Soul laughs and reclines further into the couch.

…..

"Holy freaking crap!" Maka curls into the fetal position and clutches her head hard. Soul swings into the doorway.

"Don't scream. It makes it worse." Soul covers his mouth and full out laughs at the girl's hungover state.

…

 **As I said, terrible details but it's the dialogue, sweets. Thanks for reading! -alleycat12**


End file.
